Scarlett! I got a new job!
Another one? What happened to the other 18,000 jobs?
Oh, I still have all of those. This is only part, part time.
Why do you need to have so many jobs, Annabelle? Your place is cheap and your car is paid for. It’s just you and your cat. You should be giddy with cash.
I thought Astrid was lonely so I adopted Peanut. They don’t like each other now, but they’re going to be the best of pals. I can tell!
You’re going to be one of those weird single women with too many cats, Annabelle.
Oh, Peanut’s not a cat. He’s a hedgehog. He had some special needs so I took him in.
Of course you did. What’s wrong with him?
I’d rather focus on what’s right with him, Scarlett, which is a lot. But if you must know, they thought it was wobbly hedgehog syndrome or something, but he’s fine now. Well, if I could find him I’m sure he’s fine.
There’s a hedgehog lost in your apartment? Are you sure Astrid didn’t just eat it?
Not entirely… But wait until you hear what I’m doing! I’m in the construction business!
“Not entirely” like Astrid didn’t eat him entirely? That’s only half as disturbing as the thought of you in the construction business.
Venti soy extra hot coriander latte guy came into Starbucks last week and said he needed someone and did I know anyone. So now I’m power washing houses, decks, and I’m really good at it! Mostly.
What do you mean, mostly?
Well, I don’t know if you’ve ever used a pressure washer, but it’s pretty much a tornado in a nozzle. I had a few mishaps in the beginning, but after I offered to pay for the damages it was all good.
Yeah, I blew off some shingles, broke two windows and knocked over a toddler. The toddler was not my fault by the way. She wandered out of her safe area I’d constructed out of cinder blocks and two by fours.
I always say it’s important to stay in our safe areas around you, Annabelle. You’re a menace.
Not to hedgehogs I’m not! Why don’t you start on the first question while I look for Peanut. I’m sure he’s here somewhere.
Q: How do you know if you’re sitting on a very small, special needs hedgehog? – Patty Pricklebottom
A: Not funny, Scarlett.
(read the rest on WickedLocal…)